Shall We Play a Game

Okay well it's been a while since my last review, choppy schedule has limited my access to movies, but I do think it's better than my last stretch of no updates. So lets get right into...

WarGames:
The Dead Code

As a Direct to DVD flick this movie has no official numbers. I do wish I knew a site that tracked DVD sales, I hate leaving this spot so sparse.

Set 25 years after the first movie, it follows a young hacker named Will Farmer. Will, in attempt to make some cash, inadvertently becomes the target of R.I.P.L.E.Y a super computer designed to search out and terminate terrorists.

Lets talk about a different movie for a moment, that movie being WarGames. The 1983 movie that first showcased Matthew Broderick's acting talents. It was a movie that dealt with many subjects, the advance of technology in the 80s with Computers and the budding start of what would become the Internet, Paranoia in the middle of the Cold War, and Nuclear Stalemate... The latter being such a strong subject that it alone makes the movie great.

So how do you follow such a movie? Does it's story need to be continued? I remember hearing about the big promotion for this film... Movie Theaters all over were going to put the original WarGames on the big screen for one night, followed by exclusive info on the upcoming sequel. I didn't really care aboue the new movie, I just wanted to see one of the greatest films to come out of the 80s on the big screen.... Unfortunately my local theater, though advertising it before every single movie I saw there for three months, told me adamantly they were not showing it.

So when this movie came out I waited the alloted month and rented it to see if it held up (I couldn't get it pre-street because we got it in late). The verdict? Sort of... The movie starts off really weak and stale. The premise of tracking terrorists through online games really came off as ludicrious... I don't think terrorists are funding themselves by gaming online for cash.

But then the movie continued, and about halfway through I started getting more into it... True this only happened because of the introduction of two chraracters from the first film the second one literally having me cry out with glee... Cheap move? Yes, but suprisingly it worked. Hell until these characters were mentioned I didn't even know it was a direct sequel, I just thought it was a genre sequel.

In the end this movie is not horrible, and does pick up towards the end. It may pick up at the end because it becomes even MORE like the original film, but it sort of works. I wouldn't suggest a purchase for a collection, but a rental might be in order if you enjoy these kind of boarderline morals of techology films.

Death

Nng... There is only one kind of movie that leaves that kind of taste in my mouth, yes it is once more another film by The Asylum...

Death Racers

As an Asylum Flick, and there for Direct to DVD, it has no numbers.

In a futuristic dystopian USA in THE 'Red Zone', a sort of open field giant prison, a terrorist known as The Reaper is threatening to put sarin gas into the water supply of America. The govonor of the state sends in several teams of criminal drivers under the guise of a 'Death Race' to catch him.

And again we have a film from the Asylum made to look and play like a major production released in theaters but a couple weeks ago. This of course being Death Race, which in itself is a remake of Death Race 2000. The remake of course featuring Jason Stathan, one of the big names of action films today. The original film was drenched in controversy with it's grusom premise, its a wonder why it was remade, let alone ripped off.

Once more we have another mediocre attempt at film by these people. A movie filled with The Asylums trademarks of bad acting, horrible audio, and choppy editing. The fact that the movie promotes featuring the Insane Clown Posse as a good thing makes me chuckle endlessly... And as it turns out they're actually the only ones in the movie even halfway entertaining (Though that does not say much.

Though it comes hard to review a movie like this since the source material, I mean... The source material's source material is so utterly filled with satire and parody, I can only wonder if the film was trying to emulate that. But then I remember that it's an Asylum flick, which as shown in their previous films means any show of tongue in cheek parody or wit is completely unintentional.

Avoid the film at all costs, if you catch it in the corner of your eye when it comes out on the 16th, don't even turn your head to look at it fully, your head might burst into flames.

Impersonate

...Lets just get right into this one...

Mister Lonely

Mister Lonely was only released in 8 theaters, only one of which it's opening weekend. It opened with $16,769 it's first weekend, and went on to make $167,396 national and $347,600 world wide.

The movie is about a Micheal Jackson impersonator living in Paris. One day he meets a Marylin Monroe impersonator who tells Micheal of a commune completely populated with other impersonators.

This movie... When I saw it at work I skipped over it, not intending to take it out. Later in the week I decided to pick it up since I still had a rental available. I now wish I hadn't.

This is a movie attempting to escape criticism by being 'artsy' and everyone knows you can't criticize art... Anyone who does appears to be a snob. But it's simply... inane. The movie goes nowhere, with most of the characters simply walking around and acting strange... There also seems to be a second, completely different movie hidden within about nuns leaping from planes. (Apparently there is a connection between the Nuns and main story, but I had to find a quite from the director to see what it was)

All the characters are two dimensional, none have any true emotional depth... I know they are trying to portray other people (at which they are not very good at, but that may be part of the story so that gets a pass) but it's ridiculous... From the foul mouthed Lincoln to the abusive bullying Charlie Chaplin... They're all stock, and they're all cliched. And Buckwheat... with his bizarre and out right creepy obsession with chickens...It completely took me out of the movie. Not that I was that far into it.

The movie fell short for me... If you're heavily into the artsy and indie films I guess I could suggest this movie to you when it releases on the 16th. I just hope that you will see the movie for what it is, and not simply hold it on a pedestal as a pinnacle of surreal art.

Made Maid

Keeping right on down the list lets move on to the next.

Made of Honor

Made of Honor started off with $14,756,850 it's opening weekend, it went on to make $46,012,734 national and pulled in a total of $101,325,310 world wide... Which is quite impressive.

The movie is about a man, Tom Bailey, a womanizer with a best friend of ten years, Hannah. When she leaves for Scotland for six weeks Tom realizes he loves her, only to find out she is engaged upon her return. Asked to be the Maid of Honor, Tom seeks to prove to Hannah that he is the right man for her.

This movie... is pretty formulaic. It follows the same path most 'chick flicks' do. Not to say it's bad, it's simply...shallow. If you have seen My Best Friend's Wedding you have seen Made of Honor. It simply brings nothing new to the table.

That doesn't mean the film does not have a spark. The cast is great, the jokes are funny and well delivered, and it does put a smile on your face... It would have to though, it's every romantic comedy you've seen that involves a man bursting through the doors, quite coincidentally as the Priest says 'speak now or forever hold your peace.'

The movie is standard, and that's not good. But that is not bad either so if you are looking for a romantic comedy to watch with your loved one, go ahead and pick up Made of Honor when it releases the 16th.

Love

So number two on the list. I should be able to finish the rest before bed... But lets just keep going.

The Love Guru

The love Guru pulled $13,907,130 it's opening weekend and went on to make $32,200,122 national and $38,428,159 world wide.

The Love Guru is about Guru Maurice Pitka, a relationship Guru who is hired to help the Toronto Leaf's star player Darren Roanoke get back together with his wide to restore his confidence so that the team can win the Championship.

When I saw this movie advertised I shook my head, it seemed like simply an attempt to grasp something out of the dead Austin Powers series. It felt like more of the same, and that's pretty much what it is. Strip out the fact that the characters are different, you'll find yourself in a comedy that is very Austin Powers.

But that's not to say it's bad... Austin Powers was very popular and continued to draw in fans up till the third film... What I am saying is that it's nothing new. Mike Meyers fans will enjoy it, many others may simply give it a pass. I'm not exactly sure why it was so horrendously trashed by critics...It's not horrible and I even found myself laughing a few times.

If you found yourself a fan of the Austin Powers movies, or Mike Meyers in general you might wanna pick this up. It's not the greatest movie in his career but it'll still entertain you. If you're a fan of wacky comedies I'd also tell you to pick it up for the same reason. If you're looking for something a bit more...subtle. Keep on moving.

Tick Tock

Okay, first up in hopefully several updates today...

88 Minutes

The movie opened in with a weekend grossing $6,957,216 it went on to pull in $16,930,884 national and brought in a total of $30,667,634 world wide. A respectable number.

The film follows Pacino's character, Dr. Jack Gramm, a Forensic Psychologist for the FBI who's testimony put away a suspected serial killer on death row nine years previous. As a copycat killer emerges Jack receives a phone call telling him he has 88 minutes to live. Jack must them pull the pieces together to find out the truth of it all.

I would like to say how odd this movie is. Not the film, just the fact that I was interested. I generally don't like Pacino... Nothing against the man, I just generally feel his acting comes off as sluggish. Now this is simply my opinion, I understand that he is thought of as one of THE greatest actors of all time. I personally enjoy his performance in Insomnia, where I felt he was very adept at portraying a man who has not slept in seven days.

So when I saw this movie, and saw Pacino in it, I found it odd that I was drawn in. The idea behind it intrigued me and I found myself snatching up a copy when it came into the store. Now that I've seen it I feel I may have been over eager.

This is not because of Pacino, far from it... He was rather excellent in the film... Most things were actually. The acting is decent, the pacing is nicely done, and the film is put together in a very well made way...But it was just something. It does not grab you at all, there is very little emotion in this film and what little there is feels forced and awkward, like it belongs in a different film.

There was a spark to the film,a draw, a catalyst to greatness...But nothing ignites. The film simply plays, uncaring in the audience is along for the ride. And it's a shame too... There was true potential for greatness, and the entire film was done well. There was just something important missed....Something not grasped that would have saved it and made it wonderful.

The movie releases on on the 16th. If you're looking for a suspense film you could do better, but since most other releases seem to be in the action or comedy venue, you could definitely pick this film up and not be too disappointed.

How Good is Your Kung Fu?

This on the list and probably the last for tonight. I'll be watching 88 Minutes after this, but will probably head to bed afterward and do the review in the morning... So...

The Forbidden Kingdom

Forbidden Kingdom opened up in theaters bringing in $21,401,121 it's first weekend. It went on to make $52,075,270 national and a total of $111,604,290 world wide

The movie follows a young man, Jason, who is a fan of martial arts films. He spends a great deal of time in an old Chinese Pawn shop, searching for bootlegged martial arts movie...While there he finds a staff, one he has seen in his dreams... When he takes it he is whisked away to the forbidden kingdom, charged with the task of returning the staff to the Monkey King.

You may remember in an earlier post I mentioned wishing to see this film in theaters, but was never able to. I wanted to see it for the reason many did... If you ask around who people thought the greatest Martial Artist was in film alive today you would probably get a majority of two answers, Jackie Chan or Jet Li... You may get Stephan Chow, but those people are just being smart.

This film is the first time these two greats meet... and of course fight. And is probably the single reason most people saw the film. But the movie itself is great none the less, taken from a western fairy tale the screen writer told his son, based of the Eastern tales of the monkey king, it takes bits and pieces of old martial arts and mixes them nicely to come out with a great family film.

That's right, this film is great... But it is a family film, which may deter some fans going in expecting Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon or House of Flying Daggers. The film plays for young and old... It's visually stunning and well paced... It's all around well made and I highly suggest it to pretty much anyone who enjoys an good old fashion fairy tale.

Booooo!

This one I actually did plan on putting up. I had what I planned to write all down... But I never got around to it because I could not find a poster for the film online. No joke, when I was looking there was none. I was lucky to find one just now. I know a pictures not necessary, but I like em. Gives more weight to the post.

Heckler

Heckler is a direct to DVD film that has no box office numbers.

The film is a documentary by Jamie Kennedy that deals with Hecklers, and goes into the practice of critique. It's filled with comedians who share their opinions on the people who shout at them on stage, and the people who slam them on paper.

Now this...Is obviously a difficult movie to review, for me personally since I do this on my off time. I like to think I'm fair and never actually described myself as a Critic. I only review movies. The movie does seem to lash out at critics when you watch it... But if you watch the commentary you will hear from Kennedy himself that he does believe critics are necessary, and the movie was aimed at those who believe their opinions are doctrine, and those who make a career attacking Actors as opposed to critiquing the film.

Again... I like to think I am fair... I don't believe I have ever once specifically attacked an actor, and most of my reviews, even when negative tend to try and find the good. I can only vouch for my opinion of the movie, and can only speak for those who share my taste in film, and yet I still try to take a step back and find an audience who might enjoy the film and suggest it to them.

I do attack the Asylum, yes, but I think that's slightly different because I do not attack them at a personal level, I do not like their business practice, and they do not produce quality films. It's less me hating them baselessly and more me angered by their disrespect for movie goers and even other filmmakers.

Now, as you can tell from how much this movie made me think on this subject, I truley enjoyed it. It's filled with smart funny people, some who have been spurned by reviews, critics, and all who have had to deal with a heckler. I suggest it to anyone with more than a passing interest in film or Stand Up comedy...

(Also I highly recommend the commentary track. You can hear how the movie which looks so professionally shot, was actually made on the fly and from the seat of Jamie and the director's pants.)

Dear Diary

Okay so it's time to get off my ass. I have a few reviews I've been sitting on for a little too long now. I didn't post them because, well... I'm lazy. It's all I can really say. But I will be posting them tonight, and as an added bonus I have a stack...STACK of movies on my desk, four of which are pre-streets. I am going to try my hardest to get through them all, but seeing as they all need to go back before Tuesday (IE Monday) it may be hard. Though lets movie right on to...

Diary of the Dead

The movie, diary of the dead, actually did come out in theaters. This actually surprised me as I had previously thought that it was a direct to DVD. The movie opened in 42 theaters and brought in $232,576 it's opening weekend. It topped at 48 theaters and brought in $958,961 national and $4,566,999 world wide. This may seem like small potatoes, and it is... But it did manage to double production costs, labeling it a success financially.

The movie takes place in the same world of the other Dead movies... This one specifically takes place during the events of Night, assuming Night took place in modern day. It follows the story of a handful of college students simply trying to escape the horrors that have befallen and find some sort of shelter to keep safe, all the while filming all the events.

This is yet another Handycam film, though this time with the slight twist of post editing and a second camera... This is done by explaining that one of the survivors decided that these things needed to be seen and edited together to 'show us the truth. I found this very well done. The second camera gives us larger scope of whats happening as we can now split off to see whats happening off screen of the first camera. Just as well the post editing factor gives a better flow to the movie as the film isn't obligated to show 'realism' and have the audience question why the camera man turned the camera on or off at a given scene.

I say it again, I think handycam films are great. Well no, I think what a handycam film can do for a genre... There are cam videos I do not like, example include Monster and the Blair Witch Project (Note: The Blair Witch Project was marketed PERFECTLY with it's viral advertisments, and keeping everything under wraps to keep the 'reality'...But the movie itself had a very bland plot, and no actual script. The actors were told to improv, and thats why you hear 'Fuck' every third word.)

But what Handycam films do is allow you to go to a genre that has been tried, tread, and trampled... A genre in which every plot device, every turn, every single thought to make it live again is gone, like the Zombie film, and give it new perspective. You can see these old ideas in a new light. It can give these movies one last hurrah and chance to grace our screens.

Diary of the dead was, to put it simply, great. While looking through the camera man's eyes you could feel the weight on these characters as the world disolves to nothing. There are some truley brilliant shots of decolate cities, and creepy building interiors. The addition of the Media News coverage vs. the power of the Internet also made me smile and was an idea I'm suprised nobody had thought of before. Where the News tries to cover the incidents up, the internet allows the truth to flourish.

If you're a Zombie fan I highly recomend Diary of the Dead, it's everything you love with new eyes.